California Exotics Clit Pump

The California Exotics Clit Pump is a bit of a flawed toy. There are a bunch of toys that claim to provide suction, and this is simply the one that seems to fail the least. I haven't had all of them on my girly bits, but I did handle several in stores and pumped them against the skin of my arm, and the pump part does not work on any of the others I tried in that fashion. Other reviews indicate I am not alone in reaching that conclusion.

It sort of works on this toy. If you position it exactly right, with a little patience, you can achieve suction. Quite possibly too much suction, in fact, and caution is advised or it could hurt a little. If you really put the effort in, you can master the exact science of gently squeezing the bulb to get it to do something not entirely unlike suction. If you do, that feels really nice.

I couldn't reach orgasm with it, but I'm not sorry to own this toy, because it is a different sensation. It also seems to make the clit more sensitive for whatever you choose to do next. The vibration part is useless -- it's very weak. You probably don't even want to bother to put batteries in it. The misleadingly named "penetrator" portion doesn't do much of anything and attempts to slide the head of the thing into position tend to break the suction.

The good part of this toy is the suction, because we're all lured into thinking that sounds great, and this toy is safer than a makeshift option, like a shampoo bottle with potentially sharp edges, or heaven forbid, the vacuum cleaner. (Guys are horribly wounded by vacuum cleaners all the time. But we know better, right ladies?) In all seriousness, the horror stories have kept me from trying these makeshift things, but I must admit to thinking about it, so this cheap looking plastic toy with its flaws is worth twenty five or thirty dollars in that regard.

It passes the sound test, because the vibrator portion doesn't really do anything. It's a huge pain in the ass to clean, which I could describe in detail, but I'll just say that it requires q-tips and let you discover the joy of that on your own.

Recommended would be too strong a term for this toy, but it's fairly cheap and I haven't abandoned it even though I have some really nice things. I like it more than it deserves to be liked, and you might arrive at that conclusion as well. You should definitely buy this toy if you want to experiment with suction and are willing to deal with the flaws. Finding it is tricky, although it's at edenfantasys.com (use coupon code DXN), and I also found it in a porn shop off the highway in a midwestern state. They also had fireworks.

Breakdown:	California Exotics Clit Pump
Orgasmic:	no, it's more of a warm up toy
Sound:	passes easily
Cover Story:	keyboard vacuum? snake bite kit? IDK, it's confusing-looking
Best Feature:	strong suction
Worst Feature:	pointless vibration, tricky to use
Recommended:	only in that it's better than other options