Saturday, August 15, 2009

Introductory Post

This blog is for sex toy reviews. So are dozens of other blogs all across cyberspace, so what makes this one different? Well, those other blogs are written by liberated, sexually confident women who are comfortable in their own bodies and have partners with whom to play. Which is great for them, but where does it leave the rest of us when it comes to getting the scoop on getting off?

The sexperts may know all about their g-spots, but do they really get what it's like to be a lonely virgin desperate for an orgasm, but even more desperate to hide that desire from nosy parents or even just college roommates? Well I do. Since I'm hiding here behind a pseudonym, I'm more or less comfortable owning my issues. Yes, I have told the drug store clerk that water based lubricant is perfect for fixing a sticky computer mouse. Maybe it is, I don't know, I was lying through my teeth because I sure as hell wasn't admitting to a stranger that I was planning to use a vibrator. The horror! It seems likely, since you're not supposed to use WD-40 on computer mice for the same reason you're not supposed to use silicone based lubricant on sex toys.

I've known the stress of trying to time the estimated shipping date of a package to fall during a time when my parental units were out of town, and I've bought VISA gift cards just to use them for online purchases, even though that sort of thing adds to the cost of the purchase.

Anyway, I'm not a sexpert. I'm just a lonely geek girl exploring the world of sex toys because I'm afraid of intimacy and ashamed of my flabby white body. Maybe I can get over the former and do something about the latter, or maybe not, but I can help out a few others along the way.

Please do me the favor of waiting until you're of legal age to read and take any advice from this blog. I'd hate to go to jail for corrupting innocent young women by inadvertantly admitting that sex feels good. Then they might buy vibrators instead of letting some clumsy teenage boy give them chlamydia in the back seat of an old Ford Taurus. I may be a geeky prude with body image issues but I'm liberal enough to recognize that flaw in logic. However, I do wish to not go to jail, so please, if you're underage, go read something more legally appropriate. Thanks.

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